The fine distinction between Meditation and Mediation is
the presence and absence of the letter 'T'. In meditation, the
Self itself acts as the Third Party or the Teacher and guides
Self to realize the true nature of Self. T in mediation is the mediator. Mediator
is a person who acts as an intellectual obstetrician, helping people to give
birth to the key that resolves the dispute between the parties. Mediator is not
a person who helps in conception or existence of the solution. The correct
answer already exists within us all. Aid, help and assistance of a third party
is essential and imperative to enable surfacing of the resolution. Mediator
helps disputing parties see the truth and resolve the existing conflict.
As a law of nature there
exists fundamental similarities and characteristic differences
amongst us. This dualism helps each individual to understand the
commonality and have a multidimensional view of life, events, relationships and
other things. The commonality between all human beings is to value human equality.
All beings are created equal dehors gender, colour, caste, religion,
family backdrop, social statues, IQ, EQ, SQ, and HQ. Differences exit to enable
us to appreciate and respect the significance of meaningful co-existence and sustained
harmonious relationship. All relationships are based on trust. Breach of trust
gives rise to conflict.
Whenever the will of one
person or a group of persons is supressed by another person or group of
persons, for any reason what-so-ever, conflicts arises. There is no conflict
till the suppression of will does not takes place. We all can all harmoniously
co-exist happily, peacefully and perpetually enjoy the bliss of togetherness,
without suppression or suppressing of will of another, that is being human.
However, time and time
again, people continue to exhibit their superiority and power. Some people are ruthlessly
ambitious, not for their own development, but for claiming being victorious and
dominating others. Classic examples are Alexander, Arabs, Mughals, Julius
Cesare, Napoleon, Hitler, European colonization and the like. They plunder and
loot others who have worked hard and created more resources for themselves. Their
army rape women and girls who have no way to defend themselves as war booty and
they are called great. Sad but true
All technological
development and marketing products, need basic raw materials. Countries with
technological advancement create ways to get these resources at minimal costs
or by illegal means. Gold dore, blood diamond, oil and minerals, wood and coal
and also human resources are sought to be won or obtained at tiniest price. Some
people have deep desire to dictate and control others and use them free or just
for food, clothing and shelter, for their own comfortable and luxurious
existence. This leads to economic exploitation, corruption, slavery, poverty, domestic
violence, suicides and all forms of conflicts.
Generation after
generation, people who exploit call themselves rich, educated, developed,
strong and powerful. Those who were exploited are called poor, uneducated,
underdeveloped, weak and fragile. This leads to insecurity, diffidence and a
perception of inequality and bias, based on the barometer of money. As basic needs,
which continue to ladder up, are never met and there is always deep pain and
trauma within as contradistinguished from bliss and ecstasy.
The real conflicts are
created by those who continuously perpetrate criticism, competition and
comparison arising out of egoism, arrogance, lust and greed. On the other side
are those who believe in co-existentialism, caring and creativity and make
their best efforts to resolve the conflicts by gentleness, modesty and deep
understanding of truth, which when does not find respect and reverence leads to
disruptive encounters.
Communication is the
greatest strength of human being. That is why we are called evolved. We can
converse, talk and chat 24 x 7. We can tell others what we feel and think.
Every conflict is capable of resolution, if people are reasonable, objective
and are able to communicate and address their real issues, clearly, expressly
and unambiguously. But people restrain as they feel and understand that there the
communication will likely lead to escalation of conflicts than sorting them out.
Inability to resolve conflicts gives rise to dispute. Unresolved conflicts
gives rise to disputes and unsettled disputes gives rise to litigation, fights
and wars.
As human being civilized it shifted from violent ways
of dispute resolution by dual, ring fights, battles and wars to
civil way of using the office of family head, tribe head, panchaayat
or king, a neutral third party - Legal Revolution 1.0. With proclamation
of Magna Carta (1273) the power to resolve disputes and pass decrees moved to
Parliament - Legal Revolution 2.0. Independent Judiciary became the
repository of dispute resolution from Trial Court to Supreme Court and that
marked the advent of Legal Revolution 3.0.
As several issues arose in court litigation,
people moved to arbitration, conciliation and mediation (ADR) - Legal
Revolution 4.0. Riding on the fourth wave as the human
being has moved to the Fourth Dimension and Globalization 4.0, Fourth
Industrial Revolution and Fourth Education Revolution are already in place, we
also see peace mediation marking the Legal Revolution 5.0.
Mediator uses specialized communication
techniques during the dynamic, structured, interactive process and assists
disputing parties in resolving the dispute between them.
All participants are
encouraged to actively participate in the process, vent out their grievances to
enable mediator to reach to the bottom of the issue. Mediator focuses upon the
needs, rights and long term interests of the parties during this party- centred
process. Grievances relates to past conflicts. It’s like rear view mirror
driving. Interests are futuristic, looking forward 2022, 2023, 2025.
Mediation is to help parties change the whole outlook of dispute.
Mediator uses a wide variety of techniques as s/he
guides the process in a constructive direction and to help the parties find
their optimal solution. A mediator is facilitative and manages the
interaction between parties and facilitates open communication without any vested interests and perceptions. He helps in breaking new grounds to have better
relationship, live a better and happy life. Mediation is also evaluative
as the mediator analyses issues and relevant norms ‘reality-testing’, while
refraining from providing prescriptive advice to the parties ‘You should do...’ or ‘This may be better...’
Peace mediation as
contradistinguished from mediation simpliciter, is not a process of merely
deciding a dispute or disposing of a litigation by bringing about a settlement
between the parties for the present. Peace mediation is a process of
eliminating and eradicating the conflict itself, forever. The process
entails exploring and exposing the error in understanding and perception, which
formed the very basis of the disagreement that brought about the clash of interests.
Quality Peace Agreement must result in combusting and resolving the base or
substratum of the conflict forever.
The purpose of both meditation and peace mediation is to become conflict
free by understanding the basis and true nature of the issues agitating
deep in us all. Bring about in existence a conflict free individual, family, society,
state, nation and the world.
